I'm at a crossroads. There are signs everywhere but I am not sure which way to turn.
I have spent the majority of my life at one job. Most of it has been happy but lately I've been realizing more and more that it seems I have been just hugging the sidelines waiting for something better. I am not sure what it is but I believe that there is much more to the story than what I've been doing for the last 26 years.
Time to quit sitting on the sidelines, I am ready to get out there. Life is too important to let it go by without taking a few chances and making it matter. Come and take me where I need to go life! Time to make a difference, show the way! A few pointer signs with blinking lights wouldn't hurt.
Saturday, November 1, 2014
Sunday, October 5, 2014
I had fun tonight! That basically says it all, doesn't it? My friend drove up from Albert Lea to see her brother's band play at a bar and grille in Golden Valley. She asked me to join her and I'm so glad she did. I haven't gone out to dance in ages! Let's just say it was time to let my hair down.
When I wasn't dancing I enjoyed watching others on the dance floor getting into the music. I noticed how everyone has their own unique rhythm, no one cadence is exactly alike. It made me smile, I feel so happy when I see people being themselves. It gives you permission to allow yourself a tiny bit of that freedom, opening up and showing others your personal rhythm. Whether fast, slow, or maybe a little kooky, it's sharing with others a small part of you.
When I wasn't dancing I enjoyed watching others on the dance floor getting into the music. I noticed how everyone has their own unique rhythm, no one cadence is exactly alike. It made me smile, I feel so happy when I see people being themselves. It gives you permission to allow yourself a tiny bit of that freedom, opening up and showing others your personal rhythm. Whether fast, slow, or maybe a little kooky, it's sharing with others a small part of you.
Monday, September 22, 2014
Bright moments
There are some moments that make life a little brighter. My daughter's plans for a trip to Africa with church members put a little dent in our finances. We are more than happy to pay for an experience that will last a lifetime but that doesn't make it any easier.
It is times like this when you experience a surprise event that offers renewed faith in human kind. We were told someone at church made a donation toward our daughter's trip. I don't know who it is but I want to put it out there in hopes that they see this post. Thank you for the faith, thank you for the possibilities, and thank you for assisting in making a dream come true.
It is times like this when you experience a surprise event that offers renewed faith in human kind. We were told someone at church made a donation toward our daughter's trip. I don't know who it is but I want to put it out there in hopes that they see this post. Thank you for the faith, thank you for the possibilities, and thank you for assisting in making a dream come true.
Wednesday, August 20, 2014
Larger Than Life Moments
Life always amazes me.
You can have one of those days where there are irritating situations all day long. You take deep breaths, rush along through the day, and hope to get to the end as quickly as possible. As you drive home your mind drifts through all of the happenings of the day while mentally creating a list of all of the tasks that need completion by the end of the following day. This process wears you out physically and mentally.
Then you have that moment. That one moment when something small, but larger than life, wakes you up and you again start to appreciate everything around you.
Babies are one of those "small, but larger than life" moments. No matter the stress of the day when you hold a baby and study those little fingers and toes, when you hear the small squeaks come from them as they wiggle and stretch, everything seems to be right again. All irritations and the rush of the day is in the distant past and you are directly in the moment. You pay attention to every little nuance of that seemingly infinite and wonderfully fulfilling moment.
When it passes you aren't saddened by the fact that it is over, you are joyful that you have the memory with you forever. As the years go by you become a little melancholy that it went so swiftly but it will be a part of you until you leave this earth and possibly beyond.
You can have one of those days where there are irritating situations all day long. You take deep breaths, rush along through the day, and hope to get to the end as quickly as possible. As you drive home your mind drifts through all of the happenings of the day while mentally creating a list of all of the tasks that need completion by the end of the following day. This process wears you out physically and mentally.
Then you have that moment. That one moment when something small, but larger than life, wakes you up and you again start to appreciate everything around you.
Babies are one of those "small, but larger than life" moments. No matter the stress of the day when you hold a baby and study those little fingers and toes, when you hear the small squeaks come from them as they wiggle and stretch, everything seems to be right again. All irritations and the rush of the day is in the distant past and you are directly in the moment. You pay attention to every little nuance of that seemingly infinite and wonderfully fulfilling moment.
When it passes you aren't saddened by the fact that it is over, you are joyful that you have the memory with you forever. As the years go by you become a little melancholy that it went so swiftly but it will be a part of you until you leave this earth and possibly beyond.
Monday, August 18, 2014
Beyond Life as I know It
These days there is a lot of talk of the afterlife, ghostly encounters, angels, and the beyond. I do not profess to be a believer in all otherworldly phenomena but I do entertain ideas of an afterlife, spiritual guides (ex: angels), and spirits.
There was a time when I was younger, about 15 or 16 years old, when one of my brothers ended up in a coma. I won't go into the details of how it happened but I will say it was an enlightening time in my life. He had gone out one evening and had returned home in the early hours of the morning, later that morning he was found laying in his apartment by one of his friends. The doctors determined it had happened sometime just after he had returned home, however they were unsure of how long he had gone without sufficient oxygen to his brain. Needless to say it was a difficult time for my family.
The day it happened was the last day of the school year for me. Our school had gone to the park to play softball and toward the end of the day the students could leave when they wanted. For some reason a feeling of dread had entered my stomach and I couldn't figure out why. All of a sudden I became panicked, as if something terrible was going to happen if I stayed. One of my friends offered me a ride home which I immediately accepted. When I returned home the phone rang as I entered the house. My mom answered the phone and I could hear the disbelief in her voice. She hung up, looked at me, and told me my brother was in a coma. I fainted. This is the one and only time I have ever fainted. I came to, quickly picked myself up from the floor, and hugged my mother.
That evening my older brother drove my parents and I to the hospital which was about 3 1/2 hours away. I laid in the back of the van and cried. Yes, I hate to say I am old enough that they did not have as many laws about seat belt use back then, but I digress. As I was laying there I heard a voice telling me to stop crying. I was confused, I looked toward my parents but they were busy talking to my older brother. Again, I heard the voice, "stop crying". I started to think I was hallucinating. Once more, "stop crying". This is where I got a little freaked out but decided to question why I should stop crying. The voice then told me that my brother was going to be fine so there was no need to cry. I immediately stopped crying and felt calm. I told my parents and brother what had happened and they all looked at me like I had two heads. I don't blame them, I would have thought the same thing!
We arrived at the hospital and the doctors explained what they suspected had happened, what types of procedures had already been done, and what the prognosis may be. They prepared us for the worst since they didn't know the length of time with insufficient oxygen supply to the brain. Again I assured my parents that all would be fine and to not worry. They were still in shock and trying to digest all of what had been told them by the doctors so they didn't really respond to what I had said. During the evening I kept retelling them about what I had heard, eventually they talked to me about it and asked how I had this faith that he would come out of it with few issues. I wasn't sure where this faith came from but I knew that what I had heard had to be from something or someone guiding me on the "other side". No one else had heard it, so what else could it be!
The second day in the hospital I sat by my brother's bed side. I had heard that people who are in a coma can still hear what others say, so I thought I would give it a shot. I told him that no matter what was in the past or what happens in the future he will always be loved by his family. As soon as I said those words his body started shaking from crying and tears were falling from his closed eyes. I was shocked and excited at the same time. Unfortunately my parents missed this amazing event, I think it would have helped to calm their many worries.
After 3 days in the coma my brother woke with no lasting effects from the lack of oxygen. The doctors said something about it being a miracle, I didn't think twice about it, I knew it was a miracle! I believe my guides were sent to alleviate some of the pain we were going through, they used me to make a horrible situation a little easier to endure. I haven't experienced anything like this since but my faith is unwavering. I know that wherever I am I will not be alone.
There was a time when I was younger, about 15 or 16 years old, when one of my brothers ended up in a coma. I won't go into the details of how it happened but I will say it was an enlightening time in my life. He had gone out one evening and had returned home in the early hours of the morning, later that morning he was found laying in his apartment by one of his friends. The doctors determined it had happened sometime just after he had returned home, however they were unsure of how long he had gone without sufficient oxygen to his brain. Needless to say it was a difficult time for my family.
The day it happened was the last day of the school year for me. Our school had gone to the park to play softball and toward the end of the day the students could leave when they wanted. For some reason a feeling of dread had entered my stomach and I couldn't figure out why. All of a sudden I became panicked, as if something terrible was going to happen if I stayed. One of my friends offered me a ride home which I immediately accepted. When I returned home the phone rang as I entered the house. My mom answered the phone and I could hear the disbelief in her voice. She hung up, looked at me, and told me my brother was in a coma. I fainted. This is the one and only time I have ever fainted. I came to, quickly picked myself up from the floor, and hugged my mother.
That evening my older brother drove my parents and I to the hospital which was about 3 1/2 hours away. I laid in the back of the van and cried. Yes, I hate to say I am old enough that they did not have as many laws about seat belt use back then, but I digress. As I was laying there I heard a voice telling me to stop crying. I was confused, I looked toward my parents but they were busy talking to my older brother. Again, I heard the voice, "stop crying". I started to think I was hallucinating. Once more, "stop crying". This is where I got a little freaked out but decided to question why I should stop crying. The voice then told me that my brother was going to be fine so there was no need to cry. I immediately stopped crying and felt calm. I told my parents and brother what had happened and they all looked at me like I had two heads. I don't blame them, I would have thought the same thing!
We arrived at the hospital and the doctors explained what they suspected had happened, what types of procedures had already been done, and what the prognosis may be. They prepared us for the worst since they didn't know the length of time with insufficient oxygen supply to the brain. Again I assured my parents that all would be fine and to not worry. They were still in shock and trying to digest all of what had been told them by the doctors so they didn't really respond to what I had said. During the evening I kept retelling them about what I had heard, eventually they talked to me about it and asked how I had this faith that he would come out of it with few issues. I wasn't sure where this faith came from but I knew that what I had heard had to be from something or someone guiding me on the "other side". No one else had heard it, so what else could it be!
The second day in the hospital I sat by my brother's bed side. I had heard that people who are in a coma can still hear what others say, so I thought I would give it a shot. I told him that no matter what was in the past or what happens in the future he will always be loved by his family. As soon as I said those words his body started shaking from crying and tears were falling from his closed eyes. I was shocked and excited at the same time. Unfortunately my parents missed this amazing event, I think it would have helped to calm their many worries.
After 3 days in the coma my brother woke with no lasting effects from the lack of oxygen. The doctors said something about it being a miracle, I didn't think twice about it, I knew it was a miracle! I believe my guides were sent to alleviate some of the pain we were going through, they used me to make a horrible situation a little easier to endure. I haven't experienced anything like this since but my faith is unwavering. I know that wherever I am I will not be alone.
Sunday, August 17, 2014
So much for joining the 21st century!
I began this blogger journey back in 2011 promising myself that this would be the start of a new journey. Well... let's think about this journey. It is now the year 2014 and I have posted all of 4 measly, insignificant posts.
It is with embarrassment and disappointment in myself that I post this one. My intentions at the time of starting the blog was to preserve all of my life's happenings and memories for my children and my children's children, truth be told not much has really happened with me. Life has, of course, moved forward. My children are now into their teenage years, and it is fun to see them maturing and learning to chart their own course in their personal journey. I, however, seem to be stuck.
With this in mind, I realize that I need to have more faith in myself, push myself into new experiences, and learn to color outside the lines once in a while. I admit, it scares me a little. It's difficult to imagine life being any different than what it is now. One true fact I have learned on my journey here is that not taking any chances is the worst way to experience life. It is the chances we take that make our journey worth the trip!
It is with embarrassment and disappointment in myself that I post this one. My intentions at the time of starting the blog was to preserve all of my life's happenings and memories for my children and my children's children, truth be told not much has really happened with me. Life has, of course, moved forward. My children are now into their teenage years, and it is fun to see them maturing and learning to chart their own course in their personal journey. I, however, seem to be stuck.
With this in mind, I realize that I need to have more faith in myself, push myself into new experiences, and learn to color outside the lines once in a while. I admit, it scares me a little. It's difficult to imagine life being any different than what it is now. One true fact I have learned on my journey here is that not taking any chances is the worst way to experience life. It is the chances we take that make our journey worth the trip!
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